Google Turns 18

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Yesterday marked 18 years ago that the Google.com domain was registered. What a crazy 18 years.

In honor of their 18th anniversary, here are 18 other words that Google could have used and a sample sentence to show how different our conversations could sound today.

1. Barnsnatch
“Can you Barnsnatch the directions to the nearest Thai place? I’m in the mood for lo mein. Is that Thai? I hope so.”

2. Uniturd
“I made the mistake of Uniturding Hitler and reading some of his backstory. That dude was a prick.”

3. Pruzzelgong
“Have you ever looked up your own name on Pruzzelgong?”
“Yeah, all that comes up is porn.”

4. Weenbungle
“What’s Johnny Lee Miller’s middle name?”
“I don’t know, Weenbungle it.”

5. Zizzenwool
“Did you see the Zizzenwool doodle today? It’s adorable!”

6. Searchything
“What’s that new Searchything website everybody’s talking about?”
“I think you can use it to searchy things.

7. TheGoogle
“You know what’s cooler than a lot of money? A lot more money. Also, drop the “The”. No TheGoogle. Just…”

8. Randalzorq
“OK, Randalzorq. Can you get me the phone number to Pizza Emperialist?”
“What’s that? Did you need me for something?”
“Oh, I’m sorry, Randalzorq. I was talking to my phone.”
“Nobody ever talks to me.”

9. Hashtagfind
“If anybody could read my incognito Hashtagfind search history, I’d never find work again!”

10. Barbecuehandjob
“Do you think that Barbecuehandjob Car will ever actually hit the market?”

11. Zizzenxxy
“Zizzenxxy Plus is a cool idea, but it’ll never compete with TheFacebook.com.”

12. Tacoboatparty
“I saw a dude earlier today wearing Tacoboatparty Glass. He looked super cool.”

13. Burgledurg
“Burgledurg really excels at creating services you love and then redesigning them to the point of being unusable.”

14. 12345679010111211315
“I saw on 123456789010111211313 that Scott Bakula died. Ruined my whole day.”

15. Drippingsnatchesmakemecum
“Sweetie, I’m going to be late coming home from work. If you need help with your homework, look up the answers on Drippingsnatchesmakemecum and I’ll double check it when I get home.”

16. Twistadong
“Twistadong just bought YouTube.”

17. Doingdoingbongotown
“Doingdoingbongotown Maps have their flaws, but they’re much better than any other maps app out there.”

18. Voogle
“Have you used Voogle yet?”
“No, but that’s a stupid name for a website

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